This is SaitoBot's (#fc on irc.coldfront.net) !gp and !8ball scripts in mIRC form. They were originally made in Java, but this works the same. Have fun!

on *:text:!8ball*:#:{ 
  set %8ball $rand(1,5)
  if (%8ball == 1) { set %8ballreply Outlook good. }
  if (%8ball == 2) { set %8ballreply Not a chance. }
  if (%8ball == 3) { set %8ballreply Like that's gonna happen! }
  if (%8ball == 4) { set %8ballreply Lady Luck shines upon you. }
  if (%8ball == 5) { set %8ballreply Why should I tell you? }
  msg $chan The 8ball's response to... $+ $2- $+ : %8ballreply
}
on *:text:!gp*:#:{
  set %nick1 $nick($chan,$rand(1,$nick($chan,0)))
  set %nick2 $nick($chan,$rand(1,$nick($chan,0)))
  while (%nick2 == %nick1) { set %nick2 $nick($chan,$rand(1,$nick($chan,0))) }
  set %prob1 $rand(1,100)
  set %prob2 $rand(1,100)
  while (%prob2 >= %prob1) { set %prob2 $rand(1,100) }
  msg $chan The probability of... $+ $2- $+ : Largest chance: %nick1 with %prob1 $+ % $+ . Least chance: %nick2 with %prob2 $+ % $+ .
}